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  02-12-2009, 04:52 PM
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This was in a magazine I get-

* The 8 Worst Members of Superhero Teams

Every family has a black sheep, every class has a dunce, and every group of superheroes has a member who's operating a level far below their more talented teammates. The following 8 characters were the laughingstock of their respective groups, unable to prove their worth with their meager powers.

8-Aquaman from the Justice League

When you're a member of a team composed of Earth's greatest heroes, you ought to be pretty powerful as well, otherwise some ridicule might follow. And in the case of Aquaman, much ridicule seems to follow, usually preceding laughter and finger-pointing. These criticisms, however, are easily justified since blondie's superpowers consist of being able to talk to fish, and swimming well, while other members of his team are able to shoot frickn' laser beams from their eyes and freeze people with their ice-breath. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that Aquaman's mom (Aquamom?) probably talked to the other Justice League members' mothers imploring them to allow Aquaman membership since "he's been having a real tough time making new friends." Only Superman is able to count the number of times Justice League members have rolled their eyes during the course of Aquaman's "exploits."

7-Jubilee from the X-Men

If you had the choice of selecting any superpower imaginable, would you choose the ability to shoot fireworks out of your hands? If you answered yes, clearly you've already been blessed with superhuman intelligence. Still, Jubilee -- the firework-spewing superhero -- does have days when she's incredibly valuable, most notably when the nation celebrates its independence on the Fourth of July. Because you have not seen a Fourth of July extravaganza unless you've seen Jubliee shoot roman candles out of her fingers at an invading Doctor Doom. However, in the grand scheme of things, being able to shoot artillery shells out of your digits does beat writing snide internet blogs. Then again, yours truly isn't a member of the X-Men, so Jubilee, you're still the big loser.

6-Allan Quatermain from the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

When one compiles a team of superheroes, it is very important to ensure that every member has superpowers. Otherwise you're not compiling a team of superheroes but just a team of heroes. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a group comprised of four superpowered individuals, and one individual who is officially a senior citizen and recovering opium addict. Allan Quatermain is the said elderly, drug addict who boasts more liver spots than Jay Leno has cars. That's not to say, however, that individuals who have fallen onto tough times or who may have dealt with life's trails poorly are beyond use and rehabilitation. What we are saying is that if you ever find yourself in the midst of a tag-team wrestling match and you need to select a partner to tap in, you'd be a fool not to choose the wrestler who has superhuman abilities in favor of the one who recently celebrated his 60th birthday.

5-Bouncing Boy from the Legion of Superheroes

One will never gain any respect or admiration when his foremost ability consists of inflating his body size to the point of being morbidly obese and then bouncing. And for that reason, Bouncing Boy is placed on the bottom rung of a superhero team that is made up of individuals with some pretty questionable superpowers (you know who you are, Matter-Eater Lad and Chlorophyll Kid). It really shouldn't come as any surprise then, to see this husky hero voted least likely to succeed by his fellow superpowered peers, since his greatest nemesis is probably the thumb tack. But what is surprising is that in the past 47 years, DC hasn't yet killed off the Bouncing Boy. In fact, his rebounding adventures can now be seen in more formats than ever before, since the Kids' WB has adapted a Legion of Superheroes cartoon. Because if there's one lesson the children need to learn, it's that even if you're morbidly obese, you can still successfully
"I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman."
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  02-13-2009, 12:36 AM
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I like Snarf. He wasn't really a team member anyway, he was Lion-O's pet/nanny.
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  03-22-2009, 04:05 AM
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I like Snarf tooo....
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  03-23-2009, 05:27 AM
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You ever notice Kato didnt have a secret identity. Kato was just Kato lol
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